reflect and resolve.

Twenty Thirteen.  The year I learned the most about my God.  
My labor and delivery with Charlie may not have been the spiritual gift that my labor and delivery with James was, but my pregnancy with Charlie goes down as the single most defining spiritual experience of my life.  For nine months my body was a university of what matters most.  From it I learned that God is real and knows me.  Deeply.  Truly.  Personally.  I learned in a very real way that death is not the end.  I learned that family love knows no bounds.  I learned that I can do hard things with grace and with faith and trust.  Although my pregnancy was high risk and although we almost lost our little Moose so many times, it was the most precious and beautiful nine months of my life.  I had my husband right by my side, experiencing the fear and faith with me.  I had my toddler prince whom I adore more than anything, who brought so much joy in such an uncertain time.  And I had my belly.  And all it represented.  My inhospitable belly for Moose turned out to be merciful for reasons we don’t know why but are so grateful for.  Charlie John is here and is happy and we have no idea how it happened when all the odds were against him, from beginning to end.  He’s our Mighty Little Moose, he is.  I think his fight to get here foreshadows his mighty little mission as a good man in a world that needs good men–in a world that needs him.  
Last year my 2013 focus word was REAL.  This coming year, I think it’s BELIEVE.  I want to believe in myself and my power more.  I have always had confidence issues and this is the year I want to overcome them.  I also want to nurture my belief in spiritual things.  I’ll be reading The Book of Mormon again this year, a little each day until I’m done.  I think this will help with my confidence issues, too.  Lastly, I want to show the world that I believe in family.  I believe that family is the most important thing we can invest in.  To help me focus on this, I’ll be taking a portrait of each of my children each week this year (inspired by this blogger).  
I think 2013 might have been the best year yet.  Thank you so much for sharing our journey with us!