The Morning After:

Out of it on the way there.  I was already feeling veeeeeerry
strange from the pill they gave me to take at
home before the proceedure…
Welp, I survived.  It wasn’t as bad as I dreamed it would be the night before, that’s for sure.  At least I think not, because I can’t remember a whole lot of what went down after I took my prescribed “loopy pill” in preparation for the procedure.  My memory was jogged a tad, though, when I woke up at 3:45 this morning, fully rested, in my clothes from yesterday, with a damp crotch.  My first reaction was, “Oh no, please tell me I did not relieve myself on that dental chair….”  But then I remembered that I spilt something in my lap on the drive home, but I couldn’t recall what, exactly.  
I was so thrilled when I discovered that I didn’t swell or bruise at all as I looked in the bathroom mirror in the wee hours of this morning.  I opened my mouth wide to check out the damage and make sure I didn’t just dream the whole thing up.  There was my new little implant stump, awaiting a cozy crown to cover it in just a few months’ time.  And there was my beautiful new white filling that replaced the old silver one that had started coming out.  Now I only have two more silver fillings to convert to white, which hopefully I’ll do someday.  I swear, with all the sliver fillings I’ve had, we could have listed my mouth as an asset.  And because I have one of those “big-mouthed-expose-everything-belty laughs” my fillings have left much to be desired to all who notices them.  But now I have a beautiful implant stump to show off while a guffaw.  I’d say we’re well on our way to a beautiful grill, folks.
Picking out my movies.  And praying, probably.
I changed into some pajamas even though the sun would be rising soon, and found myself sneaking into James’ room, which is really just the corner of the living room/kitchen.  As I watched him dream I couldn’t help but scoop Bubbers up and cuddle him in our trusty rocking chair as he slept in my arms.  I was kept very entertained with his grunts and his facial twitches and his sleep giggles, all of which put John’s to shame.  I love holding my sleeping baby.  He just feels so right in my arms, all relaxed and safe.  As we cuddled I tried to recall anything that went on during the surgery.  I remember not being able to fall asleep because they had “Father of the Bride” playing.  But I also remember it was over in an instant, and “Miss Congeniality” took it’s place.  There was also tugging, gagging on my part, and of course I remember the razor sharp plastic frames they make you chew down on to take x-rays. 
my cheer leaders
 I looked around for a few more clues.  The house was a mess, and although I felt fine at 4:00 this morning I plotted to milk this for all it was worth so that John would clean up for me.  I put James back in his crib and made my way to the kitchen.  I opened the fridge and saw a big Cafe Rio bag.  That would explain the wet crotch.  I remembered I spilt the cup of water in my lap, which reminded me of being asked what I wanted for dinner on the drive home.  I had enough wits about me to say Panda Express for John’s sake, because I know how much he loves it there.  I already knew I had no intention of eating anything.  But he gently said, “Sweetheart, that sounds great but I can’t think of anything soft for you to eat there.  Is there somewhere else you would like?”  And I guess I said Cafe Rio, even though I didn’t eat a bite of it.  I also remembered hitting the mattress the second I got home and drifting off into such a deep sleep that I might as well have not existed.  And that was that.
With no more clues about, I decided to return to my husband’s grunts, twitches, and sleep giggles, and eventually drifted back to sleep again.
Feeling pretty miserable afterwards.  Luckily I don’t
remember this part at all!
So far I still feel fine, but I’m definitely a little more uncomfortable now than I was a few hours ago.  I taste blood now and there is a pulse in my mouth, but all in all I am faring way better than I had anticipated.  I just feel so blessed that I can get this taken care of now and not be in intense pain anymore.  I’ll have you know, too, that after having read up on them, I think I can add “dry socket” to my list of legitimate fears now….
I do not recall this text conversation… It obviously happened
when I was very much drugged.  Let there be a
lesson in this to all of you!!! Ha.


  1. Michelle says:

    Oh this is hilarious!! I’ve had a lot dental work done, so I know what you’re going through! It’s no fun at all. I will have you know, I had a dry socket once and it wasn’t too horrible. No fun, but you get through it!

    That text is golden. So funny!

  2. Ben & Cassie says:

    that text just literally made me laugh out loud! So tender you snuck into your babies room and hopefully you recover fast, lucky no chipmunk cheeks!

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