Biscuit’s story:

As I am trying to lie in bed and rest I am noticing that I am having mild yet uncomfortable cramping in my lower abdominal region every few minutes…… Could we be having a lil’ Independence Day Boy?  Time will tell, I guess.  My hunch is that I just took too many stool softeners yesterday….. For now, though, I thought I’d share the story with all you tons of readers {Dad} of how we came to discover that we were pregnant and how we revealed the news to our families.  This post is only about nine months over-due…. {and it’s kinda a long one…}
For several weeks I had been particularly grumpy and emotional.  I could not make it through a block of church without starting to sob for inexplicable reasons and would inevitably drag John home early so he could just sit and watch me cry at home instead of at church.  My body was changing but I just attributed it to how hard I was trying to lose the ten pounds I had packed on since getting married.  We had not been trying to get pregnant and had no reason to believe I was pregnant since we had taken all necessary precautions to ensure I wouldn’t be pregnant any time soon so that we could go on a lavish French Holiday with the H. fam in the summer of 2011 {They got back from the trip a week ago}.  My emotions became so uncontrollable that I resorted to thinking I needed therapy because I was bipolar or something and was indeed a psychopathic emotional wreck.  I remember thinking John should find a new wife that wasn’t as crazy because he didn’t deserve the anxiety that accompanied being married to me.
Anyway, you get the idea–I was a legitimate quack.  
On the morning of our one year anniversary I decided I needed to take a pregnancy test so that I could just rule that out and start somewhere else in trying to figure out what the heck was wrong with me.  I didn’t even tell John my plan.  I didn’t want to get him nervous.  After all, I knew I wasn’t pregnant but thought it wise to find out for sure so that I could leave that behind.  I took the test at my mother’s house and about fell off the toilet when the test showed positive within about 5 seconds.  I immediately started balling.  I could not believe it!  All of my craziness flashed before my eyes and I realized then how obvious it was all along that I was pregnant.  I was so relieved that I wasn’t a wacko, but a whole new flush of emotions came over me—we were going to have a BABY!!  Plus the timing was perfect, with it being our one year anniversary.  I immediately started plotting how I would disclose the surprise to John that night on our special date.  
I was floating all day long at work, and I was literally going to explode if I didn’t tell someone.  It was just too much for me to take in by myself, but I didn’t want to tell John before that night.  So I texted the picture of my positive pregnancy test to my little sister Kelsey, explaining she couldn’t tell a soul, and we freaked out together.  It tided me over for the day, even though I would randomly burst into giggles here and there with no explanation for my coworkers.
So that night was our anniversary date…..  I had decided to disinfect the pregnancy test and wrap it all up nice and cute like a present.  We went to PF Changs for dinner and exchanged gifts.  I gave him a few things first, and then he gave me a few things.  Then I gave him THE present:

 and his reaction:
Pure elation:  have you ever seen a happier face?? This may be my favorite picture of John ever.  
Funny side note:  the pregnancy test totally fell on his plate and even though I assured him I had cleaned it thoroughly, he was still kinda grossed out.  So to prove how not-concerned I was about the germs, I told him we could trade plates.  Yes, I ate off a plate that a stick I had peeperd on had fallen on.  But I had totally cleaned it, no worries.  
So it was real.  Sure, we wouldn’t be able to go on the fancy-shmancy trip to Europe anymore, but we didn’t care.  A BABY!!  Now we just needed to figure out how to tell our families, and we both knew it had to be big.  
If you know the D. family, you know how hard core par core we are about charades.   You have never played a real game of charades unless you have played with us.  But you haven’t played with us because we are super picky about who we let play with us.  It’s very annoying to play with people who aren’t up to our level of competitiveness and skill.  Really the only way you get to play with us is if you marry in to our family and let us shape you into the charades player we want you to be.  
Because of our obsession with this awesome game, JW and I decided we would incorporate it into our revealing the pregnancy.  We had it all planned out.  On John’s turn, he would draw his card like normal but not act out what was actually on it.  Instead, he would act out “Jessi is pregnant.”  We thought it was bril!!  
So the time came.  It was a Sunday like any other, and we didn’t even have to suggest playing charades because we play it practically every Sunday we have family dinner at the D. home.  So no one suspected a thing!  My dad called us all in and we began playing like usual.  It came to John’s turn, and for some reason I was so scared!  But he could not have pulled through more.  It was absolutely hilarious.  He decided to throw them off at first and started acting out something that had to do with a chicken laying an egg.  Then after about 30 seconds he brought it home and my sister Andee realized what he was acting out….she yelled at the top of her lungs, “JESSI IS PREGNANT!!!!”  And we just started laughing.  Then my mom started screaming and crying and everyone realized it was true.  We could not have been happier with how it all turned out. 
Then we had to figure out how to tell the H. fam.  With Libby being only five we wanted to make it something that she would get a kick out of.  We decided to make it look like someone was asking John’s little brother Marshall to a high school dance {but since he’s not 16 he wouldn’t feel bad about it being a diversion}.  It was December, so I wrote this anonymous poem/riddle on Christmas paper about a surprise that would soon be disclosed if they followed certain instructions.  It was such a lame poem, but was perfect for the occasion: 
Now that Christmas is finally here
We thought we’d share some holiday cheer.
A family as great as yours is hard to find
So we have a very special surprise in mind.
Pop each Balloon one by one
And unscramble the word inside
to discover the fun.
Each balloon is full of letters that make
up special words
And the words put together explain us zany nerds.
This poem is silly and might leave you annoyed
But when you discover the surprise you’ll be overjoyed!
So bare with us now, cause it’s about almost time
To start popping away and forget this lame rhyme.
Just remember to stay on a balloon til it’s done,
Don’t jump ahead and ruin the fun
One word at a time, a gradual reveal,
Til the sentence shows a surprise worth a squeal!
Anyhoo, with the poem came six balloons, numbered 1-6.  In each balloon was a word they had to unscramble, and if they did it with each balloon in order, it would reveal the surprise.  The overall message was: 
1. You 
2. Are 
3. Going 
4. To 
5. Be 
6. Grandparents!  
We were in cahoots with my sister Andee who would drop off the balloons while JW and I were at the H. home so that we could “figure it out” with them and be there when they realized what it was really telling them. Again—bril!!
It went perfectly!  No one suspected a thing, except Marshall who kind of knew already.  But he made it way fun and was really getting into it.  I will never forget Erin’s reaction when she realized what the last balloon’s word said.  She was making sounds I could never reenact, I was dying.  To say she was excited is a laughable understatement.  And then Libby had some fun rearranging the last word so that it applied to her, too:
So that’s our little story.  And it’s been nothing but baby talk since, much to my delight.  And I have a feeling it’ll be that way for a while yet…
{16 more days}



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